The Joyful Life of a Bangkok Playboy

Once, my female European friend said that my time was passing: “ if you don’t settle down before you turn 30, you’re done. Girls won’t be interested in you unless you have a fuckload of money.” Since another birthday of mine has passed, the time has come for me to verify reality vs. prophecies.

After some thought, I can definitely conclude that the more experience I have, the easier forming new friendships becomes for me. After 6 years in Thailand, I am able to kick start one of the dating apps, and set up a meeting right in my own apartment. In this case, it will depend on the level of how out of this fucking world she is. Fine chicks get up to 300 messages daily on “Thai Friendly”.  In this case, you have to set up a date in a park or at a movie theatre, and getting through a thicket of messages is not an easy task of course – luckily for me I know a magic trick. I am a white boy, who knows how to write in Thai, what immediately catches their attention. When a girl writes to me first, it’s even easier – in most cases, you can try to invite her after 2 to 3 messages, with a big chance that she agrees to such an offer.

So, despite my not being in youth anymore, I can still find a willing chick every day of the week. However, it is obvious that it is quality, not quantity that matters. So, I decided to analyze the gals who I go out with „on a regular basis”. My type is the “good girl”, that is the one who doesn’t party, doesn’t have accounts on dating sites, is a university student or works in an office…and I’m her first white boy. It’s best if she doesn’t know a word of English. These rules are not set in stone, and I must admit that some of my chicks totally don’t fit this image. The girls don’t have to meet these criteria, but generally I’m into innocent ones, and I aim at that target (within the scope of my capabilities of course).

Gik in Thai means a person who you have sex with, and who isn’t your boyfriend/girlfriend. It’s a VERY POPULAR ARRANGEMENT in Thailand. Just as a reminder, Thailand is always on the top in the rankings of the most promiscuous countries – the latest study from this year showed that 70% of the people admit to infidelity in their relationship (I wonder how many didn’t admit to it). Anyway, let’s have a look at my current giks.

Gik # 1– I met up with Kik. Mostly, for a pretty mundane reason which are her big tits. Because in Thailand, finding a chick with big tits lies on the verge of a miracle. (Once Thai women were ranked number 1 for having the smallest tits in the world.)  This is simply something fun. Besides, this one is too old for my taste, because she is three years older than me. She also has a good job. She works at a hotel as a Manager, and she lives in a luxury suite on Rama 9. In general, I’m not that much into the chick’s money, but it’s nice to go for a dip after sex in a pool on the 40th floor, with a view on Skukumvith. Kik can write in English, but she doesn’t understand when you talk to her, and she’s not too good at putting a sentence together.  She’s one of the chicks who’s only available if you speak Thai – that is why I like her.  Unfortunately the chicks who have never fucked a farangai before, fall in love easily and that is precisely what happened to Kik. Fortunately, even though we didn’t discuss that topic yet, she seems to know and accept the fact that I’m seeing other girls.

Gik # 2 – Nam. I’ve known Nam for about 2 years now. We met through Tinder. She’s got a fuckload of tattoos.  I know that I said something different before about my “ideal” type of a girl, but it still turns me on. I like such extremes; either a ‘goodie two shoes’ kind of girl or a total bad ass. Nan works at a Revenue Office, and she has fallen in love with me. There was a lot of drama, because she was trying really hard to start a relationship with me. Many times she would block me on Facebook when I refused to do so, but she finally accepted my ‘friends with benefits’ thing. She only put a ban on my posting photos with other gals on Facebook, and she doesn’t let me flaunt my other contacts in front of her.

Overall, Nam is trying real fucking hard to satisfy me. She has no problem trying everything in bed and she cleans the room etc.

Gik # 3 – May. May almost fits the ideal of a “good girl”. Almost, because she does know English, and I’ve also somehow gotten a hold of her through the net, so overall she’s not all that “good”.  She is 20, and always wears her student uniform because she studies Monday to Friday. May is not in love with me, but she has fought for our relationship for a long time, and it’s only recently that she stopped pushing me. However, I cannot really admit to her that I’m seeing other girls because I’m the second guy in her life. May likes to try everything. Silly  things in bed like : “ Let’s try the horseback ride, I’ve never done it before”. She also has the habit of recording our ‘stunts’ in bed on her Iphone.

Gik # 4 – Jane. When I met Jane, she was 18.  Now she started getting on, because she’s 19. Jane is super sweet and she’s a hard worker – she slaves real fuckin hard at the pizza place, taking orders on the phone. She sends 1/3 of her earnings to her parents,, and she lives off of the rest of the money in the big city. She always insists on paying for everything herself,  even when I try to put the money for a cab in her pocket, she still refuses. I feel kind of bad because my salary is in Euros and Dollars,  so for me 200 thb is nothing, and she probably labors all fucking day long to earn such an amount. Anyway,  I admire her for being so hard working, because the majority of Thai women are the definition of laziness. Jane is fucking gorgeous… she’s virgin like. She is really young, and that really turns me on. She’s very gullible as she accepts anything I say as the absolute truth. One can see that no has let her down yet. On the top of everything, she has medium size tits, but that is awesome because they are bigger than those of an average Thai woman. There is an idiom in Thai: “nom kai dao” which means “ tits like fried eggs” because unfortunately, that is the way the tits of most Thai women look like.

Gik # 5 – Maya. Maya also cannot be a considered a “good girl”, as he works at the bar, at a Go Go club in Patpong. To make things more amusing, I met her when I was giving a tour to my Asian clients  AfterDark J  We met nowhere else but – at  her work. In normal circumstances, I would not go for her, but she clang to me and she would sit with me all evening long, even though I didn’t buy her any drinks. Maya is 25 and she’s Cambodian. And because she is Cambodian, she’s got tits. J Again, they are not big compared to European women, but one can clearly see a difference in comparison to an average Thai woman. We don’t have time to see each other too often, because she works at night and I start work at seven A.M, but we hook up whenever it’s possible. This is one of the examples which I have frequently mentioned before, namely: “ A ‘lady for money’ who will gladly do it with a guy who she likes.”  I find Maya attractive, because of her personality and because she’s different than other Thai girls.  It’s nice to talk about something different for a change, to talk to someone who’s got different worldviews than Thai people who to me – all seem to be the same. Sometime when I go to her apartment,  she’s sleeping with her girlfriends from the Go Go club. It looks funny, because the girls always go to “the hair salon” or “to have lunch” in order to give us some time for fucking.  They know well what the point is, and there’s no need to pretend anything else. J  For Maya and I it’s easier to talk in Thai than in English, what is funny considering the fact that it’s neither mine or her native language.

This is an overview of my “giks”.  I cannot think of the other “regulars” as of now.  Every week, I meet at least 2 or 3 new chicks somewhere on the Internet. As a result of it, I have very little time. Very often one chick leaves in the morning and a new one comes in the evening. Would I trade this for a steady relationship or love? No. I like being a playboy. It gives me satisfaction. Therefore the prophecy that I will suffer from loneliness after 30, never fulfilled.

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