Bangkok, home of 10 millions, place of countless naughty bars filled with depraved birds from the sticks of Issan, polluted, with never ending traffic jams, crazy drivers, amazing food purchased from
numerous street vendors and sky train above head. The most awesome city in the world with stories beyond one’s imagination happening on daily basis.
It might have been 11 o’clock in the morning or around that time. I arrived at Khao San road where I had intended to stay over night. Although many expats hate this place, saying it is too western,
touristy and so on, it remains one of the easiest places to get laid for free. Plus, I actually do like Khao San. There are too reasons for that. The party never ends; 7 days a week, be it Tuesday or Saturday, Khao San rd will not disappoint you. It is backpackers
Mekka, with accommodation starting from 100 baths per night, therefore demand for parties remains high at all times. As a consequence, which is also my reason number two, the place attracts a lot of farang starving girls. There must be no easier place in the world to pull a bird. I’m quite convinced, if I only spent enough time in this place, I could bring back a new girl every single night.
Back in Europe, it only happened to me once, that I would sleep with more than one girl during the same day. You meet a friend, have a quick shag, then you are out and about, meet someone else,
and there it goes again. Well, at Khao San rd, this kind of events simply happen on numerous occasions. There sure is a reason why they call Bangkok world’s sex capital.
As soon as I arrived, I met Nam on the street. We’ve been friends for a while. Actually, we had chatted on the internet for quite some time and accidentally met in real life, not realizing who we are at first. What a coincidence, huh? Nam is the best wing(wo)man I ever had. We used to go to clubs and bars together and she was introducing all girls to me. She was even pushing me at random chicks on the street just so we would start conversation. Well, since I appreciate her unique talent and willingness to help in that matter, my bad, I should have never slept with her.
It’s technically her fault though. We were walking around the market for a while and as the sun at noon can be literally brutal, came back to her place in order to have a shower. There is simply no way I wouldn’t make a move seeing girl having a shower in front of me. And she not only didn’t bother to close the door, when finished, she asked me to give her massage… Do I even have to say how it ended?
We did it and it probably has changed our relationship forever. No more perfect wing(wo)man… Crap! As the time goes by, Nam is off to work and I walk around looking for further adventures.
I checked in to a dodgy guest house (at the time I didn’t live in Bangkok). Dirty, stinky, with rooms looking like prison cells. It didn’t take long when I met Koy. She lives in the same guest house. Those chicks often rent hotel or guest house rooms on monthly basis. What can I say about this girl… typical utter dodgy chick from Issan.
We’ve known each other for 6 months by now, so I know her quite well. She is one of those girls who don’t bother to work and
instead go to shag foreigners asking them for money the following day. I know she has some history of stealing and even got arrested at Ko Phangan in the past. In other words, a girl one really needs to
be careful with. And one more thing. She is hot. Always in full slutwear , skinny with big boobs. No wonder I get to see her with new bloke every other night…
It surprised me to see how warmly she greeted me. Not only a long hug, but she also said she had missed me and invited to join for bottle of whiskey. What could I do, I’m like Rasputin, never say NO to alcohol and hot girls… We got properly wasted at the premises of guest house she lives in. Some other people joined us and it turned into proper party. She forced me to buy another bottle of whiskey, which we didn’t even finish, because she literally jumped on me, pulled my junk out of pants and started playing with it. I felt a bit embarrassed at first, because there was not only another
Thai chick sitting with us, but also some Italian dude, and English man who has lived in Thailand for nearly hundred years by now. But then I thought – whateva – I don’t belong to the shy one anyway.
10 minutes later we carry on making out in her bed. Geeez, she’s damn hot and slutty in a very positive way! I was really excited to bang her. All of sudden something not expectable occurs. She
says – wait for me – and leaves the room…
I’m waiting like an idiot 5 minutes…
What the fuck, I’m not only not horny anymore, I’m also pissed off. She left me in her room and who knows what is happening, I wouldn’t be surprised if she started shagging someone else by now. I
take decision to leave…
On the way out I had locked the door and went outside where we sat before (in Thailand, one does not need a key to lock the door). There is no one outside and I’m left alone. Not willing to waste the night, I’m off to The Club on Khao San, where I spend next couple of hours…
I come back around 3am. Who do I see at the gate? It’s no one else but Koy, who seeing me gets quite upset. Apparently I locked her key in the room when leaving, so she couldn’t even get through
the front gate. She is also not happy that – according to her – during 5 minutes absence when she was in the shitter, I disappeared.
But the night is not lost yet, or at least that’s what I thought. I offered her to stay in my room tonight and thought we can even finish what we started earlier. She is happy not to be homeless that night and agrees to stay with me. So I reach to the pocket and… discover that during making out, my room key fell off in her bed, so technically not only I locked her key inside, but I also locked mine!!!
I must mention that this guest house, being one of the cheapest in entire city, has obviously neither reception, nor night staff, so basically we were stuck outside. We both couldn’t stop laughing at how retarted I am.
We consider our options. I want to go to look for another place, but she has better idea and starts banging at someone’s window. Some sleepy dude totally surprised is trying to find out what the fuck
is going on. Koy doesn’t explain anything and asks this bloke straight if we can sleep in his bed…
What happens next comes to a great surprise, the guy agrees to take two strangers inside his room! Wow, what a night. I thought it is the end of adventures. The guy has double bed, so it’s comfortable
enough. Koy between us, I’m about to sleep, but apparently she has other plans. She starts making out with this dude and puts her other hand on my cock. I have had not the best
experience of 2 guys one chick 3 sum before back in Europe, so I but what the fuck, a new pussy is a new pussy, even when you need to share it with another bloke.
The guy is playing with her boobs for another 10 minutes, I jump on her pussy and it soon later, we go wild.
The next day both Koy and I are told off by the owner. She’s really rude and shouts at us, but eventually we get spare set of keys and unlock her room with our keys inside…
We search for these bloody keys and guess what. This is the greatest mystery of all, but neither mine, nor her keys seem to be in the room. Is it possible that we both lost them somewhere else the very same night? I doubt it. That would be big time coincidence. Well, we never found It and it’s a fucking X files case.
As aforementioned, what happens in Bangkok goes beyond one’s imagination. This story is quite unbelievable, but it really happened. Thailand and its capital is truly amazing, adventures never end!
And I absolutely love it…